On Father’s Day this year, I failed to send a card to my dad and it was my mom who made it abundantly clear she wasn’t happy. A few years ago, the unhappiness was about a missed card on her birthday.
Some would say, “What’s the fuss? It’s just a card! It usually ends up in the clutter pile anyways.” True. But apparently for a lot of people, it’s more than just a piece of card stock with sentimental writings inside; it’s a tangible symbol of love, friendship and care for another person.
Why do some believe that their worth (and happiness) is wrapped up solely in life’s temporary pleasures, like getting a bouquet of flowers or a new pair of shoes? That it’s measurable by social status, a nice house, a hefty bank account, or the opinion of others? The belief that this is all there is to attain a happy life is a lie that the Evil One (Satan) wants us to fall for. Is it any wonder why so many of us are dissatisfied and unhappy despite having everything imaginable?
What does it mean, then, to live a worthy life?
At a recent Mass, I had a deep encounter of Jesus’ presence that led me to reflect on this very issue of worthiness. There was an unmistakable nudging in my heart the very moment when the priest elevated the host and echoed Jesus’ words “this is my body” at holy Communion. I gazed longingly at the humble bread and wine to be consecrated and it suddenly hit me: with all my shortcomings and imperfections as a human being, was I truly worthy to receive Jesus in His Body and Blood? After all, it was my sins that sent Him to the cross!
Then, just before receiving the Eucharist, I recited the prayer: “Lord, I am not worthy that you should enter under my roof, but only say the word and my soul shall be healed.” This passage is from the Gospel of Matthew about the Roman centurion who knew he could never measure up to Jesus’ greatness and power and humbly asked Jesus for healing of his own servant (Matt 8:5-13).
In reflection, the centurion had the courage to invite Jesus for His healing touch, but do I have the same courage to invite Jesus to heal my broken and imperfect soul? The Lord always welcomed me for communion and fellowship in His house (the Church); have I welcomed Him fully into my “house / roof” (the heart)? Am I holding anything back?
Jesus proves on the cross again and again that all of us are worth dying for. He heals our brokenness by the grace of His mercy and forgiveness in the sacrament of Reconciliation, and sustains and nourishes our souls in the Eucharist. Despite our sinfulness, He keeps inviting us back. In moments of feeling unworthy, may we have the courage to call on the Lord to enter fully into the roof of our hearts so that our souls may be healed.
Photo by Brandon Morgan on Unsplash